My journey over the last ten years of owning OAK has been a tough one. Has it been full of huge accomplishments, one hundred percent, but it’s also been full of extreme lows. What I’ve learned is this company was built on a foundation of trauma. I was doing it for all the wrong reasons and being fueled by some very unhealthy decisions.
I’ve been in active therapy for over three years. When I say active, I mean every other week for over three years (minus a break I took for roughly six months last year). My therapy started with couple’s therapy (my husband’s idea), which lead to our therapist 3-5 sessions in pointing out we needed separate therapy. Come to find out, I needed intensive therapy and my husband needed to clean a few cobwebs in the basement. Therapy helped me tremendously. It helped me not only understand, but accept, acknowledge, and come to process my past. I am a better person for the work I do in this department of my life.
My mindset work started about a year ago. When I knew I was going to make the transition in my business, I didn’t want to do it alone and knew I needed guidance along the way. I don’t know why I followed Jenn, but I did. I was on vacation with my family in Utah and we were on our way to the Las Vegas airport (about a three-hour drive). I opened Instagram and she came across my page. I wondered, “who is that and why do I follow her?”. I clicked on that brightly lit circle and found myself hours later completely reading through every page of her website. In the car, I filled out a form setting up an exploratory call. A week later, we had that call in a parking lot. I cried ten minutes into it and what should have only lasted thirty minutes lasted an hour. She sent me her packages and costs associated with each option. Although 1,000% reasonable and worth it, I wasn’t ready to invest in myself. It wasn’t until two months later, after our holiday season, where I was sitting on my sofa, drinking coffee at 6am that I reopened her email. I was not in a good place. We didn’t hit our goal that month by a lot. As in $30,000…. I was in no place to pull the trigger on this investment and then I heard, clear as day, “you need this”. Five minutes later, I signed the contract and paid in full. To be clear, there were payment arrangements available, but nope, I just paid. In cash. I’m an all-in person, so I was ALL IN, not knowing exactly what that meant.
Jenn and I started working together in January of 2022. I was not prepared for the work I was about to jump into. Although I read every word on her website AND had an “intense” exploratory call, I had zero clue what the next few months would hold. The work was about ME and NOT my business. Over the next several months, we tackled everything… childhood, faith, my relationship with money, shadowing, removing lies I’ve been telling myself and every nook and cranny of life. The best way I can differentiate between therapy and mindset work is this:
Therapy is understanding the house you live in. The foundation, the cracks in the walls, the leaky roof. Accepting you didn’t build the house, someone else did (society included), but you own it. It’s yours. It’s the only house you’re getting, and you can’t update the house until you fix the foundation. Therapy is foundational work. Mindset work is the improvement. You learn to love your house, rewire and update the plumbing, you invest in your home every day and believe that your house can be everything you imagined it to be. You become proud of your home and there’s no need to compare it to anyone else’s home, because it’s yours and you gladly own it. Mindset work is transformational work. We have the capability of rewiring our brains. We have the ability to choose our life path in a healthy way. In our own way.
I am dedicated to both. The therapy and the mindset work. Neither are easy, but both are necessary. The transition of OAK was not an easy one. It wasn’t me waking up one day and choosing to step back and do things differently. I was given a vision by God. An actual vision in the middle of the day with my eyes open. I was not sleeping. I was not dreaming. I was wide ass awake. In the middle of the day. I actually said out loud, “no” and I was then challenged for almost a year straight. To be honest, I am still being challenged. It was one of the hardest years of my life. Full of self-doubt, comparison, fear, shame, and every other emotion the human body and mind can produce. I felt crazy. I was challenged almost daily and in really big ways to continue down a path that was chosen for me. I would have never thought… oh yeah, I should totally step back. Not in my DNA. Oh yeah, I should not only close one, but both retail locations that I made massive sacrifices to even have. Also, not in my DNA. I am a builder, a creative, a hustler to the highest degree. I can outwork almost anyone. ANYONE. I am Type A, controlling, a planner and a visionary. I am tough as nails and my endurance is next level. Why on earth would I step back? Because I was unhealthy, I was exhausted, burnt out and I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. My business was built on trauma. Not purpose or intention. There was no “why” other than the belief that if I worked hard, I was worthy and valuable. Mindset work helped me understand I can be everything I listed above AND emotional, giving, loving, available, vulnerable, feminine (I swing masculine most days), nurturing and wanting more out of life than acknowledgement and awards. I had to own my house.
I’m sharing this all with you because I’m hoping my story, my journey and my experiences can save you time in getting the life you want and the one meant for only you. I also truly believe that our mindset controls our life. I’ll be 42 in a couple of weeks and the idea of changing the majority of who I was into who I’m meant to be was scary. Not only that, the most important people in my life have always known me as me and not this person I was becoming. I’ve had to not only correct people’s assumptions and past experiences of me (dear friends and family), I’ve had to prove that what I was telling them and living was the truth. The new me. I didn’t necessarily have to prove anything, but I did have to stay the course. I know it’s been an interesting journey for them as well. I’m becoming someone new and they’ve been patient and loving every step of the way (most of the time). Change is hard. Not only for us, but for those around us. Even when it’s a positive change.
I hope and honestly pray that this small glimpse of my journey is helpful for you in some way. I wanted this topic to be my first journal entry for the year because mindset work has changed my life. Jenn has changed my life and the reason she showed up while driving to the airport was God’s way of letting me know he has a plan and it includes incredible people to help me get there. If you’re thinking to yourself that you don’t have the money to invest in something like this, that’s not the point. I HIGHLY encourage you to follow Jenn and understand and use her JAVA method. And let me be very clear… this is not a sales tactic or partnership between Jenn and I. I’m not getting free services or a discount. I happily pay her full fee and have had her on a retainer since the day our initial contract ended. I’m sharing this to hopefully encourage you to do the work that needs to be done in order for you to live the life you want to live. I am also more than happy to carve out time to talk to you one on one about my experience and answer any questions you may have or offer any insight I can. It has taken a village to get me to where I’m at and I’d consider it an honor to be part of someone else’s village. Cheers to the year you create and to owning the house you live in. I already know it’s a beautiful home and the rest of us can’t wait to see what’s inside.